Tuesday, January 20, 2009

I wish I had a picture

My Grandma died. It has been over a month. The funeral was this past weekend. It was pretty hectic to travel with the kids, and there wasn't much time to stop and think about all that was happening.

But I had a moment at the cemetery.

There is so much I could say, my Grandma was good, she was godly. She was full of energy, she laughed at herself. She was welcoming and loving. She was always busy, but she still had time for quiet talks with all of us. I never felt a stitch of judgement from her, although I am sure she was aware of my faults. She was the first person to teach me to memorize the Bible, and I can still quote psalm 121 (mostly), in the KJV of course.
My Grandparents are buried on the Island, at a cemetery that overlooks the water. The waves crash and roar just across the road. It was sunny, and slightly windy, but not cold. The grass was so green, the snow there has all melted. I remembered a thousand childhood walks along that beach, digging for crabs and drawing with driftwood in the sand. I remember the fun of staying at my Grandparents house and all the undivided attention I got. I remember a few of her life lessons, though I wish I had payed more attention to those and asked more questions.
So even carrying L and watching A chase the boys, and trying to smile at relatives I had not seen in so long, some I don't really remember at all, I had a moment. That's what the title is all about. I wish that moment was captured in more than just my memory. I am ok with her being gone. I miss her, I love how she loved me. But she is fine, and I will be too.

Here is her original engagement ring that I received from her when I graduated from High School. She gave all her Granddaughters a ring when they graduated, I managed to get her engagement ring, and I love it. I usually only bring it out on special occasions, but I haven't taken it off since the funeral, and I might not, we'll see. I also wore her wedding dress when I got married, a perfect fit after a bit of a hem. I might find a picture of that and add it later.

The picture up top is her and me and K in 2006. "for I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God... showing love to a thousand generations of those who love me and keep my commands." Ex 20:5-6

Thanks Grandma B. We will be feeling His love for at least 998 generations to come.


  1. Jess,

    My heart was so touched by your entry. You are an awesome writer and I really felt your love for your grandma. Keep up the blog...I love it and I love you. You are a godly woman and I am inspired by your thoughts and insight. Great decorating and wonderful pillows. I think we should plan some scrapbooking time :-).

  2. Thanks, friend. Yes, I need some scrapbooking time for sure!